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"The World's Greatest Criminal Mind" is a song featured in Disney's The Great Mouse Detective. It is sung by Ratigan and his thugs. This song also includes a special appearance by Bill the Lizard from Alice in Wonderland.

This song was included on the VHS, Disney Sing Along Songs: Be Our Guest.

The song begins with Ratigan mentioning his earlier crimes, and that his current plan will be even more wicked than before. It then changes to his henchmen singing their admiration of their evil leader before switching to Ratigan lamenting over Basil's constant interference with his plans, before wickedly claiming that not even Basil can stand in his way this time. The henchmen sing their praises again, but the song is interrupted when Bartholomew, a mouse who had made himself extremely drunk throughout the song, loudly calls Ratigan the 'world's greatest rat'. Enraged, Ratigan flings the henchman out his lair and has him devoured by Felicia. Once Bartholomew has been consumed, the henchmen resume their singing (mostly out of fear due to Ratigan giving the implied threat of feeding them to Felicia next if they didn't), and the song ends with them smashing their wine glasses together as Ratigan displays his signature grin.

Lyrics[]

Ratigan (spoken): My friends! We are about to embark on the most odious, the most evil, the most diabolical scheme of my illustrious career — a crime to top all crimes, a crime that will live in infamy!

Thugs (cheering and clapping): Yea! Aha!

Ratigan (spoken): Tomorrow evening our beloved monarch celebrates her Diamond Jubilee; annnd, with the enthusiastic help of our good friend, Mr. Flaversham (Thugs chuckling), it promises to be a night she will never forget — (chuckling) her LAST night — and my FIRST — as Supreme Ruler of All MOUSEDOM!

Thugs (cheering): Yea!

Ratigan (laughing evilly): Hahahahaha!
(sung) From the brain that brought you the Big Ben Caper,
The head that made headlines in every newspaper,
And wondrous things like the Tower Bridge Job,
That cunning display that made Londoners sob,

Now comes the real tour-de-force —
Tricky and wicked, of course —
My earlier crimes were fine for their times,
But now that I'm at it again,
An even grimmer plot has been simmering
In my great criminal brain!

Thugs: Even meaner? You mean it?
Worse than the widows and orphans you drowned?
You're the best of the worst around!
Oh, Ratigan!
Oh, Ratigan!
The rest fall behind!
To Ratigan!
To Ratigan!
The world's greatest criminal mind!

Ratigan (spoken): Thank you… thank you… but it hasn’t all been champagne and caviar. I’ve had my share of adversity, thanks to that miserable second-rate detective, Basil of Baker Street.

Thugs (spoken): Boo!

Ratigan (spoken): For years that insufferable pipsqueak has interfered with my plans. I haven’t had a moment’s peace of mind.

Thugs (spoken): Awww!

(Bartholomew sobs.)

Ratigan (spoken): But all that’s in the past. This time, nothing, not even Basil, can stand in my way. All will bow before me!

Thugs: Oh, Ratigan!
Oh, Ratigan!
You're tops and that's that!
To Ratigan!
To Ratigan!

Bartholomew: To Ratigan, the world's greatest rat! Hic!

(Ratigan chokes. All the Thugs gasp.)

Ratigan (spoken): What was THAT?!

(Bartholomew hiccups.)

Ratigan (spoken): What did you call me?

First Thug (spoken): Oh, oh, he didn’t mean it, Professor!

Second Thug (spoken): I-it was just a slip of the tongue.

Ratigan (spoken): I am not a rat!
 
Third Thug (spoken): ’Course you’re not. You’re a mouse.
 
First Thug (spoken): Yeah, that’s right. Right! A mouse.
 
Second Thug (spoken): Yeah, a-a BIG mouse.
 
Ratigan (spoken): SILENCE! (Ratigan flings Batholomew out of the lair.) Oh, my dear Bartholomew. I’m afraid that you have gone and upset me. You KNOW what happens when someone upsets me. (He pulls out a small bell. The Thugs in the Chorus whimper. Ratigan tinkles the bell. The Thugs in the Chorus moan, Ohhhh!, in terror, as an immense something approaches with thudding footsteps over a heavy instrumental.)

Bartholomew (singing drunkenly): Oh, Ratigan… oh, Ratigan… you’re the tops, and that’s that… (Singing obliviously, as an enormous cat, Felicia, looms over him. The Thugs continue to moan.) To Ratigan – hic! Oop, dear… – to Ratigan… to Ratigan… to Ratigan, the world’s grea-tee-e-e-e-est—! (Felicia swallows Batholomew with a loud gulp.)
 
Felicia: Mrrroww!
 
Ratigan (spoken): Oh, Felicia, my precious – my baby! Did Daddy’s little honey-bun enjoy her tasty treat? (Felicia belches.) I trust there will be no further interruption. *Ahem* And now, as you were singing… (He raises the bell.)

Thugs (in a panic): Even louder!
We'll shout it!
No one can doubt what we know you can do! (Ratigan laughs.)
You're more evil than even you! (Ratigan (spoken): Whoo!)
Oh, Ratigan! (Ratigan (spoken): Ha-ha!)
Oh, Ratigan! (Ratigan (spoken): Yeeeaahhh!)
You're one of a kind! (Ratigan laughs.)
To Ratigan! (Ratigan (spoken): Ha!)
To Ratigan! (Ratigan (spoken): Olé!)
The world's greatest criminal mind!

Ratigan:
From the brain that brought you the Big Ben Caper,
The head that made headlines in every newspaper,
By scampering up, and tampering with,
And hampering time and becoming a myth,

Now comes the real tour-de-force —
Tricky and wicked, of course —
The Big Ben crime was fine for its time,
But now that I'm back again,
An even grimmer plot has been simmering
In my great criminal brain!

Chorus: Even meaner? You mean it?
Worse than the widows and orphans you drowned?
You're the best of the worst around!
Oh, Ratigan!
Oh, Ratigan!
The rest fall behind!
To Ratigan!
To Ratigan!
The world's greatest criminal mind

Ratigan: (spoken): Thank you!
(sung) When these dark and devilish urges guide me,
This cruel and unusual gift that's inside me
Does wondrous things like the Tower Bridge Job,
The cunning display that made Londoners sob:

Picking them off one by one —
Kicking them off just for fun —
Such privilege, my view from the bridge
As all of them bobbed and sank;
But now this matchless plot I've been hatching 's
A much more unnatural prank!

Chorus: Even louder
We'll shout it!
No one can doubt what we know you can do!
You're more evil than even you!
Oh, Ratigan!
Oh, Ratigan!
You're one of a kind!
To Ratigan!
To Ratigan!
The world's greatest criminal mind!

Trivia[]

  • There was a deleted lyric that expanded a bit on the Tower Bridge Job: Ratigan had thrown several civilian Mice into the Thames River, and shot any that attempted to surface. It was presumably cut because of the dark and family-unfriendly nature of the lyric.
    • Interestingly, the part that says "The widows and orphans you drowned" may be the same crime.
  • Coincidentally, the name of the song was previously used with the character Egghead in the 1960s Batman show, who was portrayed by Ratigan's voice actor, Vincent Price.

Gallery[]


v - e - d
The-great-mouse-detective-logo
Media
The Great Mouse DetectiveSoundtrack
Characters
Basil of Baker StreetDavid Q. DawsonProfessor RatiganFidgetTobyOlivia FlavershamMr. FlavershamRatigan's thugsMinnie MouseFeliciaBill the LizardBartholomewMouse QueenMrs. JudsonMiss KittySherlock HolmesJohn WatsonLady Mouse
Songs
The World's Greatest Criminal MindLet Me Be Good to YouGoodbye, So Soon
Locations
LondonRatigan's LairBig BenToy ShopThe Rat Trap
Objects
Mouse BallerinaRatigan's BlimpRobot QueenRatigan's Bell
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