- “The magic scroll is finally mine!”
- ―Albert near his victory.
- “You think you can make a fool of me, Albert the Horrible?! Inspector Gadget?! The ruler of our dimension?!”
- ―Albert the Horrible
- “You can't beat me! I'll be back...”
- ―Albert's last lines.
Albert the Horrible is a fictional Nazi scientist in the main antagonist of the 1992 Disney's South Park 3: The Mountain Town. He is known for his red-and-back cape, dome helmet, and deep mighty voice, he was a relatively unremarkable Nazi SS scientist, whose most distinguishing characteristic was that he always wore a gas mask and protective bodysuit, possibly due to severe obsessive-compulsive disorder and fear of bacteria, and uncle of its prince and princess, Charlie Paker and Lou Parker.
- He was voiced by Peter Newman and singing voiced by George Hearn.
Appearance[]
Albert the Horrible is a large demon cat with red fur (hence his name), yellow eyes and long maroon fingernails. He always seen wearing a navy blue robe with a blue satin lining.
In his dog disguise, he looks like a St. Bernard with glowing light green eyes, and wears a crimson red robe, accompanied by a scarf, a fez and a pair of slippers of the same colors. On his true form, he is gigantic, muscular, and has glowing red eyes.
Biography[]
- “Dr. Claw: When we get the world, we can open any safe or bank vault in the world!
Albert: SILENCE! I didn't recruit you for such entry-level wickedness. You have so much to learn.” - ―Albert and Dr. Claw.
South Park 3: The Mountain Town (1992)[]
Red is a powerful feline demon from hell who recruited Carface Carruthers in his plan to use the magical Horn Of Gabriel to pull all the dogs from Heaven into Hell. To this end, he tricked Carface's old nemesis, Charlie, into aiding him via creating magical collars and forcing him into a deal, under the disguise of an aged dog.
After Carface captured David and taken him to Alcatraz prison, Red intimidates him with his claws and threatens him as well. This climaxed in the demon managing to actually get the horn and he began to imprison the inhabitants of Heaven (including Annabelle) inside the Alcatraz prison while growing into a dangerous monster of seemingly apocalyptic proportions, causing the sea itself to start to rise around the island in a massive whirlpool, the Alcatraz prison slowly descending to Hell.
However, Charlie and his friends decide to fight back. Charlie tried to attack him, but Red tosses him to the ground and attempts to kill him. Before Red can do so, David and the others stopped him by demanding him to leave Charlie alone, which Red scares them off. Suddenly, a pipe bursts and water splashes on Red, this giving Charlie an idea to defeat him. Red blocks David with his claws until Itchy intervenes and retrieves the horn. Red cynically hold David and the others hostage with his big claws and mocks Itchy with the choices as starts torturing them. But Itchy foil this by leaping in and tell the others to run for safety. Red corners Itchy, unaware that he had no horn until he notices Charlie with it and he proceed to chase him up to the roof. While Charlie climbs up onto the water tower with Red chasing him. Charlie is about to blow the horn, Red relentlessly tortures him with the magical red collar by shocking repeatedly as he confronts him. Fortunately, Charlie remembers the whirlpool and then letting Red's guards down by teasing him with dropping the horn and jumping off the tower for the latter to chase him. Angry, Red chases and about to recapture the horn again before he realizing his mistake too late as the water tower falls towards the whirlpool, which splashes on the demonic cat and making him fall from the great height. Red been weakened in the battle by being splashed with water as he's holding on the stairs from preventing himself of getting sucked back into hell and then corners both David and Sasha while they walking up to the second floor. The resulting in a battle that ended with Charlie blowing the horn, reversing the evil spell and sending all the dogs back to heaven, and the Alcatraz prison ascending back up to Earth and calming the sea.
Albert the Horrible's death
- “Stupid horrid boys! It was your soul!”
- ―Albert's last words before being dragged to hell in South Park 3: The Mountain Town.
Red (who had already been weakened in the battle by being splashed with water and then falling from a great height) was ultimately sucked back into hell for his failure with his last screams of agony. Before vanishing, however, Red returns and drags Carface down, as this was part of their deal because he unknowingly sold his soul to him for the red collars after Charlie mentions to Carface about what he trades for Red. It's unknown what happened to Red after his defeat, but it's likely that he was burned intro the flames after he arrived.
It Feels So Good To Be Bad[]
Albert: Now I know you've been malicious,
Spiteful and a trifle vicious
It's no secret that you cheated and you've lied
And you've done some double dealing,
Scheming, swindling, and stealing
You're an amateur, but heaven knows, you've tried.
Kamikazi (spoken): I answered your ad, didn't I?
Money, power, stature, call 1-800 brimstone.
Albert (spoken): Good boys. And very soon, you're efforts will be rewarded.
(resumes singing)
You'll develop so much faster,
Now you're working with a master.
Who will help you cultivate your darker side
You'll discover wicked ways you've never known before!
And you'll find that when YOU'RE REALLY ROTTED TO THE CORE!
It feels so good to be bad!
So delicious to be a despicable cad!
It's just so thrilling and so fulfilling,
To give somebody the worst time they've ever had!
It feels so good to be bad!
Gadget doesn't know it, but he's in my power!
He's gonna wish that he was never born!
I promise you that by the sunset hour,
I'll have MADs world!
Dr. Claw (spoken):Why can't I get it for you?
Albert (sung): Cause you had your chance and you blew it!
I entrusted you to do it,
But you bungled it and threw your chance away!
It's a problem you created,
If the horn can't be located.
I'm not naming names, (yells) but SOMEONE HAS TO PAY!
Kamikazi (spoken): Arrrggghhhhh! I could try again, boss!
Albert (spoken): You'll never find it, Only angels can give it's heavenly tone.
Constantine (spoken):But I'm an angel!
Albert (spoken):Not any more. You work for me now!
(resumes singing)
Though you gave me cause to doubt you,
There's a loathsomeness about you!
That attracts me to you as a protégé!
And when you've learned every creepy crummy thing I know,
You'll taste the joy that comes when you're the LOWEST OF THE LOW!
It feels so good to be bad!<b
So delightful to be a deplorable cad!
It's so appealing to have the feeling,
That what you're doing gets trouble brewing
And drives everybody MAD!
You've got my guarantee,
It feels so good to be bad!
So exciting!
Dr. Claw: Ole! So Inviting!
Albert:
So good to be bad!
Albert (spoken): Make sure he doesn't disappoint me!
Both (spoken): You got it, boss!
Albert: It's so, so stirring, I feel like purring!
Dr. Claw: It's deeply pleasin', to be the reason!
Both: So many will be so SAD!
Albert: Three cheers for treachery,
It feels so good to be bad!
Quotes[]
- “Dr. Claw : [on the payphone] Boss, uh...
Albert : Something happened? What's wrong?
Dr. Claw : You'll have the item today, just like we agreed. It's as good as in your hands. Nothing can go wrong!
Albert : You contemptible canine!
Dr. Claw : Don't call me canine! [Albert grumbles] Do you know the meaning of patience?
Albert : [the phone receiver burns in Dr. Claw's hand] Silence! As long as South Park Fans are involved, ANYTHING CAN GO WRONG!
Dr. Claw : [hangs up] And I'll take that as a no. Sheesh, what a hothead! [the sound of change is heard, he checks] Ah, keep the quarter. [Dr. Claw puts his halo on and leaves as the receiver burns and smokes up without notice]”
- ―Albert's first lines in South Park 3: The Mountain Town.
- “Albert : You people's have enjoyed a state of grace for far too long, wouldn't you agree Fellows?
Dr. Claw : Er, yeah, whatever you say, boss.
Albert : All these cells, filled with peoples... can you see it?
Kamikazi : Oh yeah, er sure.
Albert : And me playing the magic scroll! Can you hear it?
Constantine : Oh sure, just put your lips together and blow?
Albert : And then, the grand finale!
Dr. Claw : That's er, that's not coming in so clear actual.
Albert : Oh it will, and all thanks to Inspector Gadget and the four young blockhead boys!”
- ―Albert to Dr. Claw, Kamikazi and Constantine.
Trivia[]
- His red demon-like form is loosely based on Jafar's red genie form from Disney's Aladdin.
- Albert bares a strong resemblance to Scar from Disney's The Lion King franchise.
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