A Hell of a Cell/Transcript

This article is a transcript of the Weird World: The TV Show episode "Who's That Man?" from season one, which aired on July 5, 2019.


 * (the episode begins with Olly the postman whistling while walking up the rainbow steps, onto the rocky hill to George's house with a package in his arm, then he rings the doorbell and Sponghuck opens the door)
 * Sponghuck: What?
 * Olly: I have a package for a Mr... purple sponge on a bubble wearing a balaclava. Is that you?
 * Sponghuck: No. Actually, I'm Annie Lennox. You know, singer of Eurythmics? Give me that!
 * (Sponghuck snatches the box off Olly and slams the door, but Olly whistles and walks off unconcerned)
 * (Spoonghuck goes into the kitchen and starts opening the box, when George enters)
 * George Jacqueline: Hello, Sponghuck. I was just feeding the fish. Hey, you've got a package?
 * Sponghuck: Yes. I have got a package. It's mine. Aye?
 * George Jacqueline: Aye?
 * Sponghuck: Aye.
 * (Craig enters)
 * Craig: Eye!
 * George Jacqueline: Piss off, Craig.
 * (Craig bounces away)
 * (Sponghuck takes out of the box a cell phone and harmonies play as he raises it up)
 * George Jacqueline: Oh, my goodness. What is it?
 * (the harmonies stop)
 * Sponghuck: It's a special black brick with calculator buttons and a long drumstick that you can move up and do... it's a cell phone!
 * George Jacqueline: Wow, you've actually brought yourself a phone? Now you take photos, listen to music, surf the internet, read the news and many other stuff you do on phones.
 * Sponghuck: George, this phone does none of those things. It's only used for phone calls, which is why phones were invented - so you can talk to people, not other silly stuff that's common nowadays.
 * George Jacqueline: Sponghuck, modern phones can do a variety of things, unlike that phone in which you just press numbers like on a calculator and take to people from far away. I would never use that sort of phone.
 * (cut to George watching television and Stephanie walks past in some gym clothes holding a gym bag and Sponghuck passes him too)
 * Stephanie: Hey, George, I'm just off to the gym for my yoga lessons.
 * Sponghuck: And I'm going to the park for some fresh air.
 * George Jacqueline: OK and OK.
 * (Stephanie leaves the house)
 * Sponghuck: Will you keep an eye on my cell phone?
 * George Jacqueline: Sure, whatever.
 * (Sponghuck leaves the house and closes the door)
 * George Jacqueline: *Yawns* Let's change the channel. Many soaps these days became boring.
 * (George switches to a shopping channel, than a cooking channel, then to SpongeBob SquarePants and the theme song plays)
 * George Jacqueline: Perfect.
 * (the cell phone rings)
 * George Jacqueline: Sponghuck, you're cell's ringing! Oh, he went out. I guess I'll have to answer it.
 * (George answers it)
 * George Jacqueline:
 * (cut to Lesquik who is walking down the street)
 * Lesquik: George, is that you?
 * George Jacqueline: Lesquik? When did Sponghuck get your number?
 * Lesquik: He told me he was getting a phone, so I gave him his number for when it arrived. How is his phone?
 * George Jacqueline: Lame. You can't use the Internet, you cant take photos, you can't...
 * (Lesquik hangs up his phone)
 * George Jacqueline: Hello? Yo, Lesquik! Must be busy. I wonder who else Sponghuck has. Well, he has no one on this but Lesquik, Jeremiah and... Mayor Goodley? How and why would Rainbow City's Mayor allow him to have his number? You know, I might call him.
 * (George dials a number)
 * (cut to Mayor Goodley's house and he is sitting on one of his couches reading a book, when his phone rings)
 * Mayor Spencer Goodley: Spencer Goodley, Rainbow City Mayor speaking.
 * George Jacqueline: Mayor? Is that actually you?
 * Mayor Spencer Goodley: George? Are you using Sponghuck's new phone?
 * George Jacqueline: Yes. How did Sponghuck get your number?
 * Mayor Spencer Goodley: Well, after he came back from a successful solo mission, that's what he said anyway, I invited to have a nice posh dinner at the house. He really enjoyed it and he told he he was getting a new phone, so I wrote out my number to him.
 * George Jacqueline: Nice. Why don't you give me your number then?
 * Mayor Spencer Goodley: Maybe soon. When I get the chance.
 * George Jacqueline: Fine. See ya.
 * (George hangs up)
 * George Jacqueline: Sponghuck really needs more numbers on this phone. I'll start with mine. (adds his phone number to Sponghuck's phone) There we are. Now, time to take a trip around the city.
 * (the song Know No Better by Major Lazer ft. Travis Scott, Camila Cabello and Quavo plays)
 * (cuts to George walking around the city and the following citizens give him their numbers - Static and Minty, Samson, Joe-Freddie and Octan; Then the Jellycades are about to give George their number)
 * George Jacqueline: Wait, The Jellycades can go a bit crazy when it comes to phones and numbers and all that other similar stuff. it makes go... Oh, sod it.
 * (The red Jellycade gives him their number)
 * George Jacqueline: Thanks!
 * Red Jellycade: No problem.
 * Yellow Jellycade: We should be careful. You know what we're like with phones.
 * Red Jellycade: Oh, stop being such a square, Yellow.
 * Yellow Jellycade: I'm already multiple squares and so are you three.
 * Red Jellycade: Yeah, that's true.
 * (cut to George talking on Sponghuck's cell phone)
 * George Jacqueline: *Chuckles* I know. Wait, you've never seen The Bridge on the River Kwai? Oh, it's an awesome film. Check it out.
 * (Sponghuck enters)
 * George Jacqueline: Yeah, you saw my set last week? It was sick, weren't it?