Bad Hair Day transcript

Prologue: The theme song intro
Male and Female Munchkin Like Voices: Muppet Babies, they’ll make our dreams and life come true, Muppet Babies, they’ll do the stuff for me and you 

Kermit: When your room looks kind of weird and you wish that you weren’t there

Piggy: 'just close your eyes and make believe, and you can be anywhere'

Male and Female Munchkin Like Voices: Muppet, Muppet, Muppet, Babies, Babies, Babies, make dreams and life come true.

Scene 1: The nursery house/imaginary universe: A gymnasium
Skeeter: “Hey, you guys, watch this.”

Skeeter does a super thrilling back flip and the scene goes to an imaginary universe: a gymnasium, then back to the nursery house.

Kermit: “Wow, Skeeter, that’s super thrilling, when did you discover you could do that?”

Skeeter: “I don’t know, Kermit, but I’ve been very good at it so far.

Nanny walks right into the nursery house play room.

Nanny: “Hi, kids, I’ve got some real good news and real bad news.”

Gonzo: “Oh no, space monsters are attacking, I just knew it.”

Nanny: [Chuckles A Bit] “No, Gonzo, space monsters don’t even exist.”

Gonzo: “Oh good.”

Piggy: “So what’s the good news, Nanny?”

Nanny: “Well, Piggy, the good news is that Inspector Jones is coming to investigate the nursery house, and he’s an inspector, do any of you know what an inspector is?”

Scooter: “An inspector is a person who investigates to see whether you have any weapons and stuff, but if you do, you could get arrested and go to the jail house.”

Nanny: “That’s exactly right, Scooter.”

Fozzie: “Maybe the inspector is like a comedian.”

Fozzie: [Usual Laughter]

Piggy: “Silly Fozzie, an inspector can’t be like a comedian if he investigates.”

Fozzie: “Or maybe he’s like an investigating comedian.”

Piggy: “Oh brother.”

Nanny: (looking at her digital watch) “Well, Inspector Jones should be here soon, see you later, kids, try and stay outta trouble, okay?”

Kermit: “Okay, Nanny.”

Walter: “You can count on all of us.”

Nanny leaves to go to the living room.

Kermit: “So what do you guys wanna do right before Inspector Jones arrives?”

Fozzie begins thinking for 1 minute.

Fozzie: “Hey, you guys, I’ve got an idea, we can look at 1 of Nanny’s memory photo albums.”

Bean: “That’s a great idea, Fozzie, looking at photographs brings back real good memories.”

The 16 Muppet Babies friends begin looking at photographs of the original classic Muppet Babies episodes.

Kermit: “Hey, look at this photograph, it was taken from the time when Gonzo ate all of the circus animal cookies by mistake and admitted that he didn’t share any of them.”

Gonzo: “Well, I did tell the truth anyway, but right during lunch, I couldn’t even look at my most favorite peanut butter and banana sandwich ‘cause I was stuffed with circus animal cookies, so I didn’t mind letting Animal eat what I didn’t want.”

Animal: “Yummy good.”

Flashback to the episode: The Great Cookie Robbery

Gonzo: “My favorite sandwich in the world and I’m so stuffed with cookies.”

Animal: “Me look, me look.”

End flashback sequence…….

Skeeter: “Hey wow, I emember this 1: it was taken when Gonzo’s plush baby chicken, Camilla went missing.”

Scooter: “Gonzo wanted to leave out clues to Camilla’s whereabouts, and he imagined himself as Super Spy Weirdo.”

Piggy: “And when Nanny made chicken salad that afternoon, he thought she made Camilla into lunch, but I assured him by telling him that Camilla is a stuffed chicken.”

Flashback to the other episode: The Case of the Missing Chicken

'Gonzo: “Did you hear that? chicken salad, Nanny made Camilla into lunch.”'

Piggy: “Camilla is a stuffed chicken, Gonzo.”

Gonzo: “More like stuffed chicken salad.”

End flashback sequence…….

Bean: “Those are wonderful memories of the past years.”

Gonzo: “Hey, guys, I know what these pictures are: these were taken during our Nanny search.”

Flashback to the other episode: Plan 8 From Outer Space

Rowlf: “Hey, this place is pretty wild.”

Fozzie: “Yeah, it even reminds me of a joke.”

'Fozzie: “What time is it when Sir Lunchalot looked at his bellybutton? it was the middle of the knight, get it?!?middle of the knight?!? bellybutton?!?”'

Fozzie: [Usual Laughter]

Piggy: “Very funny, Fozzie.”

'Fozzie: “You really mean it? gee, maybe I could tell it to the princess, do you think she’ll like it?”'

Piggy: “I certainly do not, just don’t say anything and you won’t embarrass me.”

End flashback sequence……….

Kermit: “There’s nothing like good flashback memories.”

[Doorbell ringing]

Cut to Nanny in the nursery house living room……….

Nanny: “Oh, that must be Inspector Jones.”

Nanny goes over to open the door for Inspector Jones.

Nanny: “Why hello, Inspector Jones, what a pleasant surprise, please, come in.”

Inspector Jones: “Why sure, Miss Nanny, I’ll go right into the nursery house playroom and see if those kids have any weapons or not.”

Inspector Jones walks around on his way to the nursery house playroom.

Meanwhile in the nursery house playroom…….

[Footsteps Approaching]

Li’l Tooth: “Hey, do any of you guys hear those footsteps approaching?”

Gonzo: “Of course we do, Li’l Tooth, it means that Inspector Jones is here.”

Inspector Jones steps right into the nursery house playroom.

Inspector Jones: “Alright, you kids, line up and let me investigate to see if you have any weapons or not.”

The 16 Muppet Babies friends line up to see if they have any weapons or not, and Inspector Jones investigates them, but finds no weapons.

Inspector Jones: “No weapons, just a bunch of toys, games and picture books, you kids are now free to do whatever you want.”

Inspector Jones leaves to say goodbye to Nanny and exit the nursery house.

Skeeter: “Whoa, boy, that was a real close 1.”

Fozzie: “I thought he was gonna arrest all of us and take all of us to the jail house.”

Piggy: “Hey, I’ve got an idea: let’s play another game called hair cuttery, I’ll be the hair cutter and 1 of you can be my customer, now everybody line up in 1 straight line.

The 15 Muppet Babies friends line up in 1 straight line.

Piggy: “Now let’s see who my customer’s gonna be, (she points right at Rowlf) how ‘bout you, Rowlf?”

Rowlf: “Me?”

Piggy: “Yes, of course, Rowlf, now just sit right in this blue chair.”

Rowlf sits right in the blue chair.

Rowlf: “I’m not really sure about this, Piggy.”

Piggy: “Now just try and stay calm and don’t move 1 single muscle.”

Rowlf controls himself and keeps calm while Piggy does a little bit of snipping.

Piggy: “There, all finished, what do you think, Rowlf?”

Rowlf: (looking at his reflection in the portable mirror) “Hey, I think it looks, it looks…..(he realizes his bad haircut) terrible, horrible, my hair looks awfully bad.”

Animal: “Very bad.”

Kermit: “Gee, Rowlf, we’re terribly sorry that you got a real bad haircut.”

Rowlf: “What am I gonna do, you guys? I can’t let Nanny see my hair like this.”

Gonzo: “Don’t worry about it, Rowlf, I know just the thing that can cover up that real bad haircut.”

Scooter: “That’s a great idea, Gonzo, but where do we find a red baseball cap?”

Skeeter notices a red baseball cap on the sofa.

Skeeter: “Here’s 1, (she walks right over to Rowlf and hands it over to him) here you go, Rowlf, now Nanny would never even notice your real bad haircut.”

Piggy: “Rowlf, I’m terribly sorry about the real bad haircut I gave you, would you mind telling it to all of us in song so that I won’t do it anymore?”

Rowlf: “No, Piggy, I won’t mind at all.”

Kermit: “Hit it, Rowlf.”

Rowlf: [Playing Music On Toy Piano]

Rowlf: 'It all began in 1 straight line, she picked out a lucky number that had to be mine, but when I sat right in that chair, and snip, snip, snip, it just wasn’t fair, it became a tad bit sad, my hair is really bad'

All 14 Muppet Babies friends (except Animal, Li’l Chef and Beaker) his hair is really bad

Rowlf: 'it’s driving me real mad, what am I to do? my hair is really bad'

All 14 Muppet Babies friends (except Animal, Li’l Chef and Beaker) his hair is really bad

Rowlf: my hair is really bad……

[Music Ends]

Piggy: “Rowlf, I promise to never give you a real bad haircut.”

Rowlf: “Thanks a bunch, Piggy, I really appreciate it.”

Kermit: “That’s good, now let’s all go to the dining room, Nanny’s made a real good dinner meal for all of us.”

The 16 Muppet Babies friends go right into the dining room, enjoy their dinner and later dessert meals, then go right to bed and fall asleep.

The very next morning…….

Bunsen: “Good morning, Rowlf, did you sleep okay?”

Rowlf: “Of course I did, Bunsen, is my hair back to the way it was before?”

Bunsen: “See for yourself, Rowlf, Beaker, give me the portable mirror.”

Beaker: (giving Bunsen the portable mirror) “Mee, mee.”

Rowlf: “Here goes nothing.”

Rowlf takes the red baseball cap off his head and looks at his reflection in the portable mirror again.

Rowlf: “Hey, my hair’s back to the way it was before, it’s not a real bad haircut anymore.”

Kermit: “Congratulations, Rowlf.”

Fozzie: “Now we don’t need to worry about Nanny freaking out over that real bad haircut that you’ve had yesterday afternoon and evening.”

Piggy: “And I won’t ever give you another bad haircut at all.”

Fade to another black screen………

= Voice Cast Members End Credits = 'Frank Welker as Kermit, Skeeter and Beaker (voices)'

Laurie O’Brien as Piggy (voice)

Greg Berg as Fozzie and Scooter (voice)

Russi Taylor as Gonzo (voice)

'Dave Coulier as Animal, Bean, Janice and Bunsen (voices)'

Katie Leigh as Rowlf (voice)

Danny Cooksey as Walter (voice)

Ian James Cortlett as Sweetums (voice)

Kathleen Barr as Li’l Tooth (voice)

Drake Bell as Floyd (voice)

Bob Bergen as Zoot (voice)

Jim Cummings as Inspector Jones (voice)

Tress MacNeille as Nanny (voice)